A2 Advent Devotional

by Nozomi Imanishi

For to us a child is born . . . And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
—Isaiah 9:6

Sometimes I wonder if I break God’s heart all day, every day. And not because I’m doing something wrong, something bad. But he sees how I pretend to be busy with the cookies at the side of the register, so I can avoid looking directly at the clerk, who is too handsome for me to look at.

And if I were God, and I saw my kid, and how frightened she sometimes was I’d be pretty heartbroken. But then again if I were God, and I could see the clear, sharp pieces of joy that sometimes intersect through the flatness, wouldn’t I be that much more precious to him?

Some things God loves about me: the scrap cloth that keeps my place in books, my chipped nail polish, the way I smell after a day at the beach, my quietness. And it makes me feel like a treasure, and he would say it slow like this; ah- tre- jah.

But he must have been awfully worried, because he came all the way to see me. I’m not really sure why he did it the way he did. Why he had to be born and why he had to have a mother, but that’s the way it happened.

I guess in part he wants me to know that he gets it, the whole awkwardly alive-thing. And even though I know that’s probably not the deepest or even most important reason, I’m okay with just that.

December days are thin like eggshells. It’s like I can feel God’s heartbreak and love for me, clear through the soft sunshine. I’m going to try and be less afraid this winter season. I’ll at least give it a try. It’s the least I can do, since God’s come all this way to meet me here again.

Nozomi Imanishi
Church Planting Associate

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